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Newsletter October 2015

Members Newsletter October

International day of older persons

The spirituality of Age is celebrated on the First day of October. No less than Ban Ki-Moon sent a message to those of us who qualify, he being very concerned about the sustainability and age inclusiveness in urban environments, to say nothing about our handicaps, reluctance by some to use Blue Tees. and more provision for those with Blue Flags!

Members Newsletter October
Tom + Jerry
Donald Duck
Mickey + Minnie
Iain + Erling

One thing is for sure. Old people know more about being young than young people know about being old?

Stableford. Asia. Sunday 4th

Although only autumn really, October heralds the return of winter rules. Not everyone remembered. A lot of the time there isn’t much benefit to be gained? Other than psychological. Anyway there was a good turn out for this Stableford team event, the best two scores counting on each hole. Teams of four, of which there were 15 in action. Prizes were presented to the best four teams, who proved to be on the day:

1st 93 Steve Tomlin, Vivien Shute, John Youngs, Cees Lagerwerf
2nd 91 David Gilchrist, James Reid, Heimo Kupsu, Matti Kaarnakari
3rd 91 Lotta Syversen, Bill Field, Elizabeth Stahl, Peter Edstrom (on handicap)
4th 87 Siggi & Hilda Bjaranson, Peter Penney(3 only)

Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October


Medal. Europa. Tuesday 6th

Conditions were very windy for this, the last chance to earn a place in the Medal Winners’ Final coming up later this month. By the end of testing play familiar names had stamped their authority on the course. Lesser mortals struggled somewhat.

1st 71 Carol Rees
2nd 71 Karen O’Connor (on handicap)
3rd 72 Jenny Chesterton

1st 72 Chris Slattery
2nd 72 Bobo Syversen (on handicap)
3rd 72 Adam Tinkler (on handicap)

A three way tie with the same score is unusual and it might also be mentioned that veteran David Millar was only a point away from joining them. Up The Blues!!
No pictures available.

National poetry day thursday 8th

Members Newsletter October

As all members will know Haiku is a Japanese form of poetry which is often short and doesn’t rhyme. Nowadays poetry of all kinds is recognised for what it is. A difficult way of telling your story. Not to be daunted, and to mark the annual anniversary, this piece re- emerged from my personal archives, having first seen the light of day back in 1955.

He grabbed me round my tender neck
I could not call or scream
He dragged me to his drinking room
Where he could not be seen
He tore away my flimsy wrap
And looked upon my form
I was cold and damp and scared
Whilst he was hot and warm
His feverish lips he pressed to mine
I gave him every drop
He drained me of my very self
I could not make him stop
He made me what I am today
That’s why you find me here
A broken bottle thrown away
That once was full of beer


World egg day. Friday 9th

Members Newsletter October

Years ago we were urged to “Go to work on an egg”. Now the importance of this natural product is recognised world wide with promotions and events like, for eggample, “The Fastest Omelette Maker” competition. A day for all of us to get cracking?

Captain’s Day Trophy. Asia. Sunday 11th

Members Newsletter October

It is extremely doubtful whether anyone was greatly disappointed when the Captains decided to call off the competition because of the rain. Yes, rain. Lots of it too. Very welcome to farmers, golf courses, reservoirs, and lazy gardeners, but not golfers and holiday makers?

Bird lovers

Peter Robinson was playing Europa with a friend when a parrot flew onto his buggy. Presumably hungry the colourful creature then inspected their heads, looking for who knows what? When the buggy moved on the bird took refuge in a tree but a friendly whistle encouraged him/her to return. The entourage remained together until the 18th when the bird, hopefully still foodless flew off, never to be seen since. Bearing in mind the old saying that a bird in the hand is safer than one overhead it is pleasing to report no messy “accidents”.

Stableford. Asia. Tuesday 13th

Members Newsletter October

‘Twas a lovely day but, understandably, buggies were restricted to the paths following all the rain. Whether the extra energy expended led to there ultimately being but one handicap adjustment, up or down, or whether it was the slowness of the greens but, either or both resulted in some lower than usual scores. With one exception. The gentle giant, “Mighty” Bill Field, obviously wondered what all the fuss was about as he nonchantly handed in a card showing 39 points. Winning, as they say in horse racing circles, by a distance. For his efforts Bill was “rewarded” with a handicap reduction of 2.7 lowering him to 15.5

1st 33 Ritva Hagglund
2nd 32 Ria Van Wershoven
3rd 31 Connie Maphar

1st 39 Bill Field
2nd 32 Chris Slattery
3rd 32 Peter Penney (on handicap)


La liga v Santa María. America. 15th

Having been comprehensively beaten in the away match on October 1st our ladies went into the home fixture trailing 0-6 and with a slightly changed line up. Connie Maphar and Lotta Syversen, Carol Rees and Karen O’Connor, Ria van Wershoven and Jenny Chesterton has a formidable look about it and they certainly did better, managing to draw, 9-3 to Santa Maria overall though so a bit disappointing.


Heard it through the grapevine

Just when everyone thought David Moody had rid himself of golfing mantra comes news that he is deep into Stack and Tilt. Or is it Twist and Shout? Whatever. He is currently in the persuasive verbal clutches of Messrs. Bennett & Wheelhouse, those well known purveyors of anti establishment golf teaching. Basically this requires one to be a contortonist, and to take divots in front of the ball. One is put in mind of a road map which tells you everything you want to know except how to re-fold it. Slap and Tickle sounds more fun. We wish you well though, David, Man never made any material as resilient as the human spirit. Your quest for cyborg technology is a demanding one, but if anyone can find the relationship between inner space and outer space, and build a bridge between mind and matter, it might well be you. Then you would be forgiven for blowing your own trumpet.

Members Newsletter October

Rainbow Scramble. America. Sunday 18th

For there to be a rainbow sunshine is essential. Today it was conspicuous only by its absence. After another wet night the skies were leaden and threatening. Again Blue Flags were denied the less able so that reduced the field a bit. Other withdrawals were equally understandable. It was a dubious day for golf with seldom seen wet suits on parade for this “different” competition. All members of each team played off the same tee, changing from white to yellow to blue to red and back again. Thereafter normal Scramble rules applied. Thankfully The Rain Goddess, yes – she is back, must have overslept because the conditions remained dry for the most part, and the air was quite warm. Captain Sonya deserves a medal for all the hard work she did at the check in desk in the pro shop. Already on duty whilst most others were probably finishing breakfast, she coped admirably with a near 25% drop out level, managing to change a field of 58 into 44 and moving players from one team to another as they arrived. Not all teams were of four as a consequence, and indeed a very formidable duo finally came out on top of the pile. Well done, Sonya, and thank you.

1st 61.2 Arthur O’Connor & Bobo Syversen
2nd 61.4 Kathy O’Connor, Gordon Edwards, Anders Engstrom(guest)
3rd 61.5 Alan Jewett, John Youngs, Monique Peters

Again there was no photographer on duty at prize giving so this edition my prove a bit light on worthy winner pictures.


What would Alf Garnett have said?

Members Newsletter October

Life long West Ham supporters, already a little uncomfortable about moving to a posh new stadium next season, will be saddened, but not surprised, to hear that Upton Park is to be demolished and replaced by housing. The “Chicken Run”, in which much time in formative years was spent, will be no more. It is understood that new residents will enjoy the educational benefit of a West Ham FC museum, and there will be a statue of the great Bobby Moore to remind everyone of the Glory Days, in the Sixties, when we won the FA Cup, European Cup, and World Cup (with a little help).

Members Newsletter October
Upton Park


Medal Winners’ Final. America. Tuesday 20th

After a night of rain the day broke bright, dry and sunny with this year’s golfing “stars” poised to do battle for a place on the Honours Board. From a grandstand seat overlooking the 16th., this spectator was able to watch all 24 contestants in action. No hole-in-ones but a couple very close. Only two to play and the weather near perfect still. As might be expected on such days the scoring was close at the front of the field, with the leaders finally finishing as follows:

1st 76 Karen O’Connor
2nd 77 Connie Maphar
3rd 77 Lotta Syversen on handicap
No less than five ladies finished with the same 77 score! Karen’s tap-in birdie on the 16th. probably did it for her.

1st 71 Paul O’Callaghan (cut 0.6 to 17.1)
2nd 72 Dean Moore (cut 0.2 to 10.5)
3rd 75 Iain Macaulay

Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October

The bookies will have been happy with this result, seasoned campaigner Paul surprising all with a more than commendable performance. Nice to see another sprightly veteran, Iain, showing as well.
I keep wanting to use the word antiquarian in relation to the Blues Brothers but none of them are 787 x 1346 mm. That’s what comes of spending 50+ years in the Paper Industry.

Stableford. America. Tuesday 20th

Members Newsletter October

Lesser golfing mortals engaged in the wake of the medalists but without those reliant on Blue Flags. Denied twice in succession. Understandable but very frustrating. As it must have been for Sisyphus, King of Ephyra, who was punished by being compelled, for eternity to roll an immense boulder up a steep hill, only to watch it roll back again. Fingers crossed Thursday will see the end of my golfless eternity!

Appreciating fully the lovely weather after all the rain players turned in some respectable scores, the best being:

1st 33 Anna Edstrom
2nd 33 Vivien Youngs on handicap
3rd 32 Jill Davies

Members Newsletter October

1st 36 Alan Jewett
2nd 35 Derek Steele
3rd 35 Richard Hinds on handicap

Members Newsletter October

Humour doesn’t always travel well

Having decided on a poetic theme for this month, and in the sure knowledge that there are very few computer-less members, the following submission is presented.

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin know sea.

Eye strike a quay and type a word
And weight for it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh

As soon as a mist ache is maid
And nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
it’s rare lea ever wrong

Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
It’s letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew

Liga Senior Costa del Sol 2015

With just three more matches to go Bobo and his cohorts are within spitting distance of the title which has long eluded us. As the following league table shows.

Members Newsletter October

The picture below shows our team which turned the tables on La Siesta in the return leg on 22nd. thereby winning the match 3.5 to 2.5 overall. Those unfamiliar faces to the left are the enemy.

Members Newsletter October

Happy 53rd Anniversary Lilian. 27th


Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October


Members’ Festival Week

One cannot but have sympathy for Agustín Alonso and his team? They put a lot of effort into preparing for this important week in the club’s calendar and then the weather put a damper on things. To put it mildly? Mornings broke encouragingly but with cloud looming.

Members Newsletter October

The Texas Scramble on Sunday 25th. escaped rain though, and being on Europa buggies were allowed at 90 degrees. There were a few mumbles about team composition but 18 teams finished without getting wet and with some very good scores, everyone being then entertained to tapas and drinks by the Management before prize giving took place. The table carrying the prizes was groaning under their weight. Permanent plaques for the first three places, plus an assortment of useful items as well as the usual bottles of wine. An impressive display for which we are indebted to Prosegur who sponsored the event.

Members Newsletter October

Members Newsletter October

The leading teams were:
1st. 57.37 Ursula Wetzel, Louis Lentelink, Arthur O’Connor, Val Penney
2nd 58.11 Paul O’Callaghan, Sighvatur Bjarnason, Kirsti Makela, Vivienne Youngs
3rd 58.77 David Wilson, Erling Johnsen, Ritva Hagglund, Jan Debrauer
4th Dean Moore, John Youngs, Gordon Edwards, Mike Robbins

Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October

Playing and indulging were swiftly followed by more serious stuff, the AGM being held at 1630 instead of the advertised 1700 ! Debate was lively on certain issues but Secretary Jenny Chesterton will be reporting more fully in her forthcoming Minutes. She is currently on holiday.

It was a different story altogether on Tuesday 27th. when action switched to America and the Order of Play sheet began with a sombre NO BLUE FLAGS heading. That ruled five players out immediately, including your editor who was looking forward to being in the thick of the action like any good reporter should be. The early starters went out in rain. The late morning shifts fared better, By the afternoon it was really quite nice out there but word has it that it was very wet underfoot, and one group registered a 5 hours and 10 minutes round. The scores ranged from respectable in the conditions to frankly unbelieveable! More anon on that subject. There were some very good players on parade, but none more so than Kath O’Connor who played off +3 and we don’t often see that on our team sheets? Heading the leader boards at the close of play were:

1st 76 Kath O’Connor
2nd 86 Ria van Wershoven
3rd 91 Lotta Syversen

1st 79 Adam Tinkler
2nd 84 Bo Syversen
3rd 84 Bertil Josefsson

1st 94 John Crombie
2nd 96 Erling Johnsen
3rd 98 Sten Valentin

Genial Bill Field, never far from the limelight, had a bad round. 129 over par would certainly suggest so. Editorial ears pricked up at the prospect of a great story but it was not to be. Turns out the computer was to blame. Those playing in the Stableford competition marked their cards with a stroke or cross when acknowledging a blob. This, it seems, is unacceptable to the computer, which requires a score. To compensate, as the story goes, it is allocated a number and pre-set to replace blobs with it. Without knowing how many blobs Bill actually got, but let’s say six, rudimentary arithmetic suggests the number being entered by the computer is about 19 !! In fact someonesubsequently confirmed that figure in conversation. In which case then, the bottom end of the score sheets are not that meaningful?

Bill is only mentioned as an example and, being the competitor that he is, will probably have been disappointed to see quite a few with much, much higher tallies. Thank goodness for computers. They take the blame for most things nowadays?

Wednesday 28th., dawned bright, beautiful, and dry! There was no Blue Flag notice on the team sheet. A mood of optimism pervaded the immediate atmosphere. Up, fed, and dressed for the fray, a telephone call to the pro shop sent hopes of action spiralling downwards. Might have guessed, I suppose, being on Asia, but a frustrating pill to swallow. Especially as it proved to be a really lovely day. Sunny throughout, attractive but non-threatening cloud formations, and that special Andalucian light which brought such as Picasa to this part of the world albeit not to play golf, of course.
Pin positions were tough but Asia dried out very well so play was much more enjoyable than the previous day. Whilst some scores might have looked a bit hard to believe there was no question about the final leaders and their tallies.

Members Newsletter October

1st 147 Kath O’Connor
2nd 181 Ursula Wetzel
3rd 182 Lotta Syversen

Kath’s amazing winning margin, despite her +3 handicap was made up of a 76 followed by a 71. Great golf.

Members Newsletter October

1st 66 Ria Van Wershoven
2nd 64 Kate Bradley
3rd 61 Anna Edstrom

Members Newsletter October

1st 162 Bertil Josefsson
2nd 170 Roger Dew
3rd 171 Alan Jewett


1st 67 Adam Tinkler
2nd 66 Derek Steele
3rd 65 Peter Edstrom

Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October

1st 63 Sten Valentin
2nd 62 Johan Van Wershoven
3rd 61 Erling Johnsen

Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October

Relaxed and in golfing mode after an enjoyable but demanding month looking after grandchildren, Sten is to be congratulated on a steady showing. Erling had a good tournament too. New tricks be blowed, what’s wrong with the old and trusted?

Millenium trophy. 2 Ball Better Ball. Asia 30th

When Agustín announced that buggies would be allowed on the course today, albeit strictly 90 degrees only, it was like music to the ears. My euphoric mood dimmed a bit when David Moody’s bag crashed off the back of our buggy. An omen perhaps? Then a bit more when the notice board at the inner top of the glass window fell and bounced off the steering wheel. Um! My mood almost did a complete U-turn when Peter Robinson insisted on telling us all how ill he had been the previous day, including vomiting for the first time in his life. A remarkable enough statistic but perhaps not of great interest to a wider audience trying to psych itself up for the battle ahead! Little wonder, I thought, that my first two holes might have earned 38 strokes under the curious computer system. However, good company, lovely weather, a course in better condition than expected, eventually led to some reasonable golf. Life is never dull when Peter and David Moody are in your four ball.

No less than 92 players took part this year with the outcome resulting as follows:
1st 43 John & Lilian Crombie
2nd 41 Bo & Lotta Syversen
3rd 41 Dean Moore & Stuart Bewley (on handicap)

Members Newsletter October

Mention might be made of David Wilson who put in a surprise appearance this week, somewhat ahead of recovery schedule following his serious back problems. As if to prove that you can’t keep a good man down he, and wife Marie, finished in 14th place.

This report would be failing if it didn’t compliment Agustín and his team for coping with adverse circumstances so well, for organising everything in a proper manner, scorecards prepared, GUR properly marked, even a Starter to announce the players, and detailed results available on line in record time. Compliments to all involved, and thank you.

Members Newsletter October

Their final efforts went into the Friday night Captains’ Presentation Dinner, in the clubhouse, almost al fresco, very well supported and thoroughly enjoyed by everyone. The kitchen were on form, the prizes never ending, the mood convivial and friendly. It was nice to see Dennis Turley there, accompanied by his sister from Australia, and equally good to see popular John and Lilian Crombie take home the prize of the day – The Millenium Trophy. John has had his health problems but is back, cheerful as ever, and playing well. Lilian too, despite the worry and burden of being a Newcastle United devotee. The newsletter cameraman was kept busy and will doubtless need to re-charge his battery, both literally and personally. Bed after midnight is a rarity these days. The outcome of his efforts will appear either below or within the relevant event report.

The camera wasn’t the only bit of kit of which good use was made. The marathon prize giving ceremony saw the microphone in turbo charge mode. Captains Brian and Sonya were a lively double act throughout, spirits fuelled no doubt by the happy occasion, whilst Agustín had ample opportunities to practise his English. Then came Kath O’Connor and Bertil Josefsson, the main winners, she briefly but he, as befits his profession as a lawyer, at a little more length. Which was interesting because he is not a well known club figure. His musical impression of the late Larry Adler was an unexpected item on the agenda. John Crombie got a bit emotional, understandably, having just won something meaningful with his wife of 54 years – for the first time! Even Ashley was invited to say a few words and, brightly attired in pink shirt and bold belt, was unusually kind and complimentary about us all.

Agony aunt gone awol

Regular readers, if any, will doubtless have noted that there is no contribution from ElLA CALAmity this month. Normally an editor would be chasing up such a popular contributor but this is difficult when the identity is unknown. Even the sex is unratified despite the pseudonym. If any member is privy to the secret, a quiet nudge would be helpful. Thanks.

Looking ahead. Next year beckons

The Matchpla (Kockout)y Entry sheets for 2016 are now up on the notice board. The closing date for entrants is the 31st December 2015. If you are not going to be here between now and then, but wish to play, please contact the incoming Captains Vic and Pauline Hilliard and they will do the necessary for you.


This is supposedly the shortest poem in the English language and is attributed to Mohammed Ali at a Harvard graduation address.

Members Newsletter October

October in action


Members Newsletter October


Mr. and Mrs. Consistency

Previous records are not to hand but there cannot have been keener competition than this year? The closeness of the final scores is shown below but hearty congratulations to Carol and Roy. Actually when you look at these lists, and the form maintained ove such a long period , we ought to be able to pick a team that wins everything?

Members Newsletter October

David Evans is the member responsible for keeping all the statistics and is thanked for both his hard work and precise numeracy. What a difference a decimal point could make?

Happy Halloween

Members Newsletter 

Another month ends and it is pumpkin time once more. Especially in New England where the inter-village competition to grow the largest produces some incredible results. When last there the winning fruit weighed in at almost 650 kgs and had to be brought to the prize giving by truck!

Members Newsletter October
Members Newsletter October

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